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4 of 4 found the following review helpful:
Great first novel! Mar 09, 2009
By J. Holmes
I finished reading this book last night and I can't stop thinking about it. The novel reads almost like a collection of short stories and is reminiscent of a film like "Paris, Je T'aime" where all of the components intertwine. Miller's story follows Sean, not your stereotypical gay man, through high school, college, and beyond. What is refreshing in this novel is the fact that the main character is not stereotypical. He's not endlessly looking for love by hooking up with strangers every night in hopes that it will turn into something more; Sean, while searching for himself, knows what he wants from life and does not want to be stereotypical.
This story is touching and I'm glad that Miller has created such a relateable character. Being a gay man myself, it gets old and tiring when all you see is stereotypes. This novel provides, finally, someone that we can relate to, at least on some level.
A friend of mine once told me that all we can ask from art is that it moves us. This novel will do that. After finishing it, I was left wanting more. The ending (I won't give it away) is beautiful. Miller couldn't have ended it any other way. The novel never tries too hard and has a very lean and concise plot (actually the way the story is written is really remarkable!). For a debut novel, I am amazed.
If you great story, I highly recommend this novel. It will move you.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
Amnesic Nostalgia by Zea Miller Nov 14, 2010
By Indigene
"Amnesic Nostalgia" is the brilliant debut novel by Zea Miller that challenges accepted notions of the relevancy of our memories and our past in shaping our identity. Mr. Miller writes this story with such eloquence, intelligence and wisdom that it is unbelievable to me that this is his first published work. The story itself is a simple and quiet one, yet his writing of it is so intricate and rich that the words dance.
The central premise of this novel is the notion that nostalgia itself is a condition of amnesia, that it is a passive action of remembrance of a better or different past than what actually was. Admittedly inspired, in part, by Marcel Proust's "À la recherche du temps perdu" (In Search of Lost Time), a novel that examines involuntary memory, Miller explains on his web page that in writing this story he "wanted to connect memory with identity, particularly with forgetting and revisionism. Since we are defined by our 'remembrance of things past,' identity is fluid ..." and that "... The past is subject to memories you never had yet, remember all the same, or amnesic nostalgia."
"Amnesic Nostalgia" follows the life and experiences of Sean Gates, a gay teenager living in rural Michigan over the span of a number of years from high school, to college in Flint, Michigan, and then to Paris as a young adult. The novel is divided into three parts demarcating Sean's journey, starting with "Beginnings No Longer Matter" (high school), "To Those Who Have Been Different" (college) and "For We Never Are Alone" (Paris).
Sean's story is not necessarily a unique one in the sense that he encounters many of the things, both good and bad, that a young gay man will likely experience in his life. What is unique about this story is the level of relevance that Sean ascribes to some of these experiences in allowing them to define who and what he is. It is not that Sean is unaffected by the events of his life, he is. But he does not afford them and the past an important enough place in his life to allow them to dictate his identity, his belief in himself and his place in the world. Sean doesn't merely persevere the negative experiences of his life, nor does he necessarily fall victim to them. He simply does not allow his past to hinder his future. In this sense, the character of Sean and his interaction with and reaction to the people and events around him, offer the reader an alternative way of thinking and being, a liberation of sorts, as Sean looks forward and not back. In Sean, Miller has written an incredibly compassionate and intelligent character that is not readily forgettable.
The author both tells Sean's story, his feelings, actions and reactions and at the same time takes the writing to an altogether different level of critical thinking. In this respect, "Amnesic Nostalgia" was both an emotional and cerebral reading experience for me. I raged against the hatred, violence and injustices inflicted upon Sean and rejoiced in his courage, irreverence and resilience in response to the homophobia surrounding him. Equally, I found myself stepping away from these emotional responses to critically debate within myself the question of the relevancy, or irrelevancy, of our memories and past in defining us.
In terms of quality, Miller's writing whether in respect of prose, narration, characterization, dialogue or symbolism, is exceptional and with an outstanding command of the English language his writing offers possibilities for a conceptual paradigm shift in gay literature, and by extension a new conceptual language to go with it. I offer two of my favorite passages in the book. The first is the opening passage of the Prologue in which Miller introduces the symbol of the closet and one that he revisits throughout the book to detail Sean's evolving relationship with (his) homosexuality. The latter is the opening passage to "For We Never Are Alone" in which I feel Miller best encapsulates the central theme in "Amnesic Nostalgia" and the irrelevance of our past in shaping our identity and therefore our future:
"Children are instinctually afraid of closets in the dark of night, a portent of evil lurking in the background of shadows. It isn't an irrational fear, for monsters come from closets. It's not something easily forgotten, or a fate yet known. As young adults, some of them venture into their closets, some come out. Sean danced with his."
"Points of embarkation have always been scarier than the actual leaving of them, for destinations hold a measure of resolute acceptance in their finality, or an impatience in their transience. We're not afraid of the journey - we're afraid of leaving, because life once left behind is never the same, return or not. We're not afraid of the future a new destination offers - we're afraid of outliving our past. In time, our memory doesn't betray us, our past does, for it changes as we do. We can no more accurately remember our past than we can see our future. Our embrace of a false past than a true one blindingly binds us to the unknown, for when our memories are changed, so too is their import, offering us chances anew."
This is an absolutely phenomenal novel and easily among the best of the best of books that I've had the pleasure of reading in quite a while. There aren't enough stars to rate this book and five stars certainly fall short. I not only highly recommend "Amnesic Nostalgia" by Zea Miller, but truly believe that it should be mandatory reading for all: male and female, young and old, queer and straight. And if Mr. Miller is correct in his observations of a generation denied, then said generation is no longer starved of voice.
This review was originally published online by Rainbow Reviews on October 4, 2009.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
Looking back at what I've done Aug 25, 2009
By J. Betts
"JayBezz"
I read about people you meet in Heaven helping you to see your life's purpose. Amnesic Nostalgia is the story for those of us who want to understand that relevancy of live while we're yet living. Sean's experiences in life definitely prove as points of growth for him, but the most interesting thing about that is that Sean doesn't know it, or seem to notice. By seeing these literary "still shots" of his life, you begin to understand Sean's narrative. It is atypical. It is touching. It is funny. It reads true.
Miller shines with his command of the English language and in his ability to relate to the reader without "dumbing down" the content. As a first novel it stays with you and has many self realization points that stay with the reader long after the eyes leave the page.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
Reality. Mar 29, 2009
By M. Cummings
--This book was well written and understood. Attracting a wide audience of attention and understanding. It made me think, smile and consider so many things of the past that I would have done differently and not so differently. I am not an avid book reader but I didn't put the book down until I was done cover to cover. The best way I am able to describe it is, "reality." Written in today's style writing and I beleive anyone could relate to something in this book.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
 Nostalgia Now Mar 11, 2009
By Pat Pending
"morning fog"
Intelligently written without being patronizing -- it should be required or recommended reading for every young person -- from the 7th grade up, for gays or straights and everyone in between. It's a good primer for those who are curious and just want to know what it feels like and for those who are already there. It is a fast-moving and entertaining read, as well as insightful.
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