HomeShop at BookSurgeSelf-HelpSpiritualThe Siren's Dance: My Marriage to a Borderline: A Case Study |
|  |
| Customer Reviews: | | Average Customer Review:
Write an online review and share your thoughts with other customers.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
 a difficult read Aug 26, 2009
It was a difficult read because I know where he's coming from, being raised by a mother with BPD. And I agree with what one reviewer said about those who've given it a bad review, I suspect they have the disorder. One even said she did. It is my opinion that those who have the disorder, should refrain from reviewing a book that is geared toward those of us who've been involved with some one who has the disorder. I know Anthony's pain, i know it so well. for those of us who have a loved one with BPD, it is a comfort to know we're not alone.
To recap- those of you with the disorder, do yourself a favor and don't read it. i know with my mother, if you want to "set her off" then start pointing out her BPD flaws, and watch her get defensive and go into a rage. same thing here. those of you with BPD who are reviewing this book and giving it bad reviews, maybe the problem is that it shoves into your face the pain you've cause those who love you, and you can't deal with it. Do us all a favor, there are plenty of books out there written specifically for those with BPD. Stick to those ok? The last thing we survivors need, is someone else to minimize or de-value our pain, and what we've been through.
2 of 3 found the following review helpful:
 Compelling and Horrifying Jan 02, 2009
My reaction to the character with BPD is likely what most readers' would be: I was horrified and repelled by her, and it was difficult to remember just how tortured she was by her illness enough to feel compassion for her. Fortunately, the writer (her husband) never loses sight of this, and reminds us throughout--especially in the afterward--of the horror people with borderline personality disorder experience even just in breathing. In the end, I was saddened--for I know, as a therapist and a layperson, that most people with BPD never live the lives for which they yearn. Many who have the courage and insight can and do move on to live fulfilling lives. But their experiences (and their families') from the time of birth, until they're able to heal just enough to find their equilibrium, is hell on earth. This book painted that picture--of just one case--so accurately. At times it infuriated me; at others, it brought me to tears--just as my own clients with BPD can do.
4 of 5 found the following review helpful:
Rather subjective and one sided account , not charmed by this man Oct 07, 2008
Someone already title their review "it takes two to tango" so I couldn't use it, my feelings exactly. "Dr" Walker did not charm me in the least, he seems very cold and unemotional except when he is describing his own suffering. There were lengthy descriptions he gives us of his warm catholic family background and closeness yet he happens to marry this woman almost on a whim- he carefully articulates his marriage of conveience and keeps it hidden from his family. A Catholic background of any tradition purports to consider marriage a sacrament , and it's irrevocable.Yet he seemed to plunge right in knowing he could abort the mission if there was justification. There was a tone of elitism about the whole tome, he thinks he is better than his crazy wife, and yet he clearly describes being seduced by her beauty and the drama of the whole thing, after all the title of the book is called "siren's dance" The whole premise of thsi relationship is shallow and peurile and yet years later the author feels like he is doing us a service by revealing this ditch he fell in to. I didn't find much warmth and insight, but obviously some other readers did find much value. I do appreciate that the author is sharing his experience with us.
3 of 9 found the following review helpful:
 Word of Warning Jul 02, 2008
Thanks to "Anthony Walker's" fear of being identified, we do not know if he is a real person or really if anything he is writing is true. He works at "A Prestigious American Hospital." At best this is letter to Playboy and at it's scariest this man is one of the 10% of men in the mental health profession who admit to sexually assaulting their patients. Because the provider/patient relationship creates such a power imbalance, it is not legal or possible for a patient in the psychiatric care of someone to "consent" to a relationship. "Anthony" is a coward who has not given his "wife" the chance to defend herself. I think in all likelihood, she would tell us a very different story about a controlling and abusive man.
4 of 7 found the following review helpful:
 Walker's a Little too Self-pitying May 29, 2007
When a young med school student ("Walker") decides that a young, attractive woman who had just attempted suicide needed love, he was correct. "Michelle" needed love, but she more desperately needed help. Like many borderline females, Michelle is unbelievably sexy, impulsive, full of rage, childlike, and incredibly needy. Because of his misguided and naive attempts to save her, her rage, self-doubt, and hate mushroom. Walker is overmatched and Michelle's unrelenting suicide attempts and physical attacks nearly destroy him. The story is gripping; but, worse, it is pathetic. Walker makes little effort to understand Michelle, to participate in her therapy, or to get her to see a better psychiatrist. His "love" is weak and amounts to nothing more than fearful placating. I don't know what horrified me more, his limitations or her rage. Walker unabashedly places the blame on Michelle - who was too mentally ill to controll her behavior. A far better book is Rachel Reiland's account of her recovery from BPD, "Get Me Out of Here." Rachel's psychiatrist is an astounding physcian and healer. He never allows Rachel to manipulate or intimidate him -- and he is committed to making her well. Where Walker leads the reader to believe those with BPD are forever consigned to hell, Rachel's psychiatrist leads her to heaven.
|
| | |
|
|
