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19 of 19 found the following review helpful:
 Same Info That Is In Her, "Getting To I Do" Book Apr 30, 2010
By Michelle S.
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I found the book to be extremely duplicative of one of her previous books. The, "Getting to I Do" book. All the same info in that book is in this one. Only it's arranged differently. This book also seems very disorganized. It's basically just saying that "nice guys" needs a lot of signals of interest in order to get up the courage to ask you out. (And many times, they will still chicken out!) And the #1 reason they want to go out with you is to have sex with you. Nasty, I know. But unfortunately, true a lot of the time. That's why it's important not to "give it up too soon". Make sure the guy can stand the test of time and actually get to know you. Instead of getting to know just the sex part of you. Men are visual and really don't care what we're saying, just how we appeal to them when we are saying it. That's why Pat Allen always says no sex without commitment. Because if he truly likes and cares for you, he will commit to you in order to have sex with you. Life doesn't come with guarantees, but it helps weed out men who are only out for sex without commitment. My advice would be to just buy the, "Getting To I Do" book. It better written and well organized.
11 of 13 found the following review helpful:
 Not really Pat Allen Dec 29, 2009
By Atticus
Think what you will of Pat Allen (personally I think she is interesting and well-intentioned--one more set of thoughtful opinions to add to the mix). THIS book is not Pat Allen--it is what happen when you take her ideas and put them in the hands of a pompous, self-congratulatory frat boy who delights in overstatement, poorly substantiated argument and witless jokes. Following his advice, I read the book in mixed company, aloud. It makes for good party fare--but not the kind the author was expecting. There are lots of things in the book to which one nods assent: we ignore our biology to the peril of our happiness, etc. None of it is new. None of it has been "suppressed" from the public because it is "politically incorrect. " This was written by a man who went to hear a charismatic speaker and thought he could do her one better. He doesn't. Don't waste your money or time.
8 of 10 found the following review helpful:
 P*ss me off it did indeed... Thanks to the author though, not the facts Jan 04, 2011
By Anon
"Anon"
I gave this book two stars because I really did find pieces of it extremely interesting - namely the parts on oxytocin, brain function, PEA, vasopressin, pheromones and birth control. It goes where standard relationship books that focus mainly on the psychology of relationships, and the people within them, fail to go. The "perfect" monogamous relationship isn't just due to behavioral perfection -it's largely due to biological and chemical factors as well. I'm assuming that most people realize this, but the book really hits on it in detail.
However, it failed to touch on many of the human psychological aspects of relationships at all, which I was disappointed about. Don Schmincke (who is Really your author, with Dr. Pat Allen as the contributor, and not vice versa. I guess they are touting it as the opposite since she's the one with the name) writes from a point of view so seemingly detached (and I'm assuming a little bit bitter, given his offering at the beginning of the book that his marriage did not work out) to individual, modern human relationships that he actually comes across as a little bit of a do*che with an aloof power complex. This is especially interesting since I'm sure in his mind he fits into the "Gentleman" category of men rather than the "Nerd" or "Punk" categories (a book full of scientific journal citations and obvious intellectual back patting actually does break men into these overly simplified and offensive categories based on their levels of testosterone). Yes, we are all just animals (as this book more or less testifies) - to an Extent. We all have a lot of individual and unique psychological, emotional and spiritual complexities (if you view spirituality as vibration, energy, frequency) floating around in our "screaming protoplasm" that are specifically human as well though. I would read this book, with a grain of salt, alongside a book that explores all of that other stuff within relationships.
I would also like to say to Don (in the event that you read Amazon reviews) that this book did not p*ss me off! because of its biological and factual content but because of your voice that was also decidedly misogynist. Example - "A young American woman was also recently quoted: 'He was like sooo hot, like the first few months he rocked my world, but, y'know, like, well, gets kind of lame, like right now, I mean, it's like....'" Real nice. Another gem of a quote was "You probably want to bang your head against the wall by now after hearing that a guy sees 80% of a relationship as being just sex. OK, one hundred percent. But don't interpret this as devaluing you as a person, such thoughts reinforce eating disorders and encourage women to risk their lives with dangerous surgeries so they can look sexy." Well, maybe this is just because I am stupid woman, but I guess I'm not really sure how to interpret that if not devaluing me as a person... Yes, sex is obviously important and there are definitely women who would do well to step it up in that department if they want to feel cherished by their boyfriends or husbands, but I'm prettty sure that there are men out there who have forged genuine friendships with their girlfriends or wives (Women are allowed an education these days! Occasionally we have something interesting or funny to say!), and enjoy spending time with them as people too...It's a little hard to take you seriously as a respectable, intelligent non-do*che with quotations like that. *So to readers, if these sorts of sexist stereotypes really offend you, I wouldn't read.* Which is a shame, because a lot of the content really is interesting. There is one glaring inconsistency though. The last chapter (and a good bit of the book) deals with the importance of monogamy for civilization (despite how so very tortorous for men this is) while chapter two tells us that "Some research suggests that [the loss of some testosterone in many instances after marriage] explains why men tend to lose their professional edge for professional success shortly after marriage, while unmarried men seem to keep achieving success well into their fifties and sixties. Professional success reemerging after a divorce further supports this effect." Hmm, so which is it? I prefer to think the former, since it makes sense - even just personally, outside of civilization and society - if you reference Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, but it would have been cool if the authors could have made up their minds...
Oh, and one more word to you two Intellectual Giants, Don and Pat. I cannot think of a more painstakingly boring day than the "perfect day" that you outlined for me as a woman. Additionally, if the testosterone driven "gentleman" is indeed supposed to be intellectual, healthy and successful in his testosterone driven quest to bed me, you have his diet a little off for his "perfect day". I don't know many modern men with an education who would eat even a quarter of the red meat that you describe in a day. Scientists have officially declared red meat (and especially large quantities) poor for your health. Maybe I just hang out with a bunch of nerds and punks though, huh? (Which is weird, since they are the ones with the traits I'm supposed to find attractive - healthy, intellectual, successful...I'm not really sure that "Masculine Energy Man" was supposed to place the image of a brutish, stupid, detached Caveman in my mind - I can speak for most non-desperate, worthwhile women who do fine on the dating scene already and are just interested in relationship dynamics and say no thank you there - but that's what you managed to do. It made me want to put the book down. Why would I Want to attract or keep that? Ew.) Picky, yeah, and I'm sure you were just trying to be funny, but it came across as archaic, ignorant and contradictory, like a lot of this book, unfortunately.
Worth reading (it's a short quick read) for some of the actual facts, citations and historical references, but it will p*ss you off - and probably not in the ways it was meant to.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
Review for Dr pat Allans associate Nov 18, 2009
By A. LOGAN RIVERSBY
The book contains true facts about human species. Explanations of these facts and how they affect our life on everyday bases will astound you. It true that if understood, these facts will help you have better life. Unfortunately the book it self is badly written, in unskilled manner. Sentences are not porperly constructed and some of important issues are left unexplained. The book is overpriced by $20 per item.
 This is a must read for all women and their daughters!!! Jun 15, 2010
By Maria Reyes
"Marey1967"
I recommend this book to all women and their daughters who are old enough to start dating and are looking for the right mate. This book is very insightful and provides information on why men think and act like they do and how to attract the right type of man in your life. Having been in many relationships in my life this book opened my mind to clearly see the mistakes I made in the past and how I kept ending up with Mr. Wrong!! Thankfully, I am now married to Mr. Right, but it took me a long process to understand what I wanted exactly in a mate. This book helps women understand their inner nature as women. That we women want it all and that's ok! It's also the "shortcut" to understanding men, what they want and how their thinking process works. A definite must read!!
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